A Whole Lotta Shakin' Going On

During a meeting I had with my supervisor awhile back, I expressed an interest in becoming more comfortable with public speaking. Since that time, I have had a small moment of standing in front of a limited group. Yes, I was bright red and nervous the entire time, but I did it. Looking back, it wasn't that big of a deal, considering the subject matter and the members of the small group.

Recently I was asked if I would be interested in running a conference call meeting. I just started laughing and told her absolutely not, under any circumstances, will I ever be interested in running a meeting. Ever. Said person reminded me that I wanted public speaking opportunities, to which I responded, "Yeah, well I just changed my mind on that."

See, standing in front of a small group of people that I know very well is pretty intimidating for me. Running a meeting? Paralyzing. I don't mean to say that it makes me nervous, I mean to express that the mere thought of doing such a thing scares the living hell out of me.

Example A:

Today I was sitting at my desk, working as usual when my mind started to wander. I had created a scenario where the Big Boss Man asked me to present something during a meeting. Nothing big, just a contribution that I would be able to make to a Large. Group. Of. Important. People. By the time I came back from this little day dream, I was just about beside myself, tearing up, bright red, and even shaking a little.

Don't ask me for another example. I'm all worked up just thinking about Example A!