Wednesday, December 26, 2007

The Aftermath

I hope your Christmas was as wonderful as mine. It SNOWED. In SEATTLE. On CHRISTMAS.

Seriously. It was awesome. Never had snowfall on Christmas before.

So, not to get all Hallmark-y on everyone, but I have to say I am sometimes amazed to the point of being overwhelmed by the generosity of my boyfriend's family. I know we've been dating for over two years now, but I still appreciate and love the fact that I am included in all of their family happenings. Not just there, taking part, but INCLUDED. They bought the most wonderful gifts, and I couldn't be more grateful.

Nick stole the show with his BIG BIG present. He bought me this. HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT. I can't even begin to tell you how hot this camera is. It's a digital SLR, so I can use my old lenses from the 35mm on it. HOT. He also gifted me with 4 Gigs of memory. HOT yet again.

Pre-Christmas was spent with part of my wonderful family. My little sister turned 9 right before Christmas, and we were able to drive out to see her for her birthday. It was really special, and Big Sis Kimmi baked a very special birthday cake with PINK!!!! frosting. We had such a nice time, and it was so great to see everyone after over a year since our last visit. My mother looks just AMAZING. She lost 60(!!!!) pounds, People! Mom and I are the same size. We could trade clothes, for Christ's sake!

So, yeah. My Christmas was really great.

In other news, I was laid off from my job today. Awesome, no? Rather glad for the moment that I wasn't in the office much last week, as the original plan was to break the news before Christmas. Seriously, no hard feelings though. I loved the company and appreciate the gentle way the news was delivered. I even got a ride home from my boss! And severance pay! And medical benefits for another month!

I guess if Karma's going to kick your ass for quitting a previous job without notice, this is the way to go.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

From The Editorial Section of The Seattle Times

Christmas is never a train wreck

The train had been down this track thousands of times before. The holiday runs usually were uneventful, but this morning was different. The giant tree dwarfing the train toppled as if in slow motion. It landed across the engine's path with a thundering crash and a flood washed out the track.

"Uh-oh, derail," cried the boy with railroad savvy inherited from his grandfather and great-grandfather, both roadmasters who started with the old Northern Pacific. The toy engine had jumped the track and its cars were tangled in the branches of the fallen Christmas tree. Only the coal car suffered damage, but the casualty count was high. The Sugar Plum Fairy lost a toe shoe, as well as her arms, which were still hanging on a tree branch elegantly posed in fourth position; the Mouse King's sword landed in a candy dish. A glass-blown cardinal was utterly crushed. Several more ornaments were scattered around the room. A couple of soaked gifts would have to be rewrapped.

The dog's post-traumatic sheepishness gave him away. Investigators deduced the culprit had caused the calamity as he once again barreled between presents to slake his thirst with Douglas fir-flavored water.

Crews arrived and remedied the derailment with a couple of towels, a vacuum, plastic wrap over the tree stand, a spousal argument about what constituted "straight" and a tube of Superglue. The engine was righted, and the cars recoupled. The Sugar Plum Fairy was restored to her frozen pirouette and the Mouse King regrasped his sword. Everything else, save the cardinal, was as good as new. Or so it seemed.

The worried young trainmaster pushed a button. The whistle sounded. "All aboard," the bearded plastic engineer with the red hat shouted, presumably as he stoked the engine. The train resumed its elliptical journey, skirting a stand of gift bags. Relieved, the boy pushed another button.

"Ho ho ho," the tiny Santa shouted from atop the chugging engine. "Merry Christmas!"

— Kate Riley

Copyright © 2007 The Seattle Times Company

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Potential Website Update

I'm thinking this might be a good image for the cake section of my website.

The Art of Contrast

The guy boarding the bus has cornrows, a doo-rag, baggy pants, puffy coat, and a gangster swagger. Under his coat is a tiny Chihuahua. I'm mildly amused by the contrast he's creating. As he walks by to find a seat, two girls get up to follow him to the back of the bus so they can "say hi" to his puppy.

Suddenly it all makes sense.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Loaded Question - The art of IM'ing

M: jesus. I want to stab myself in the foot everytime I call Direct TV
T:why are you calling Direct Tv?
M:work. we just got two new receivers for the cafe downstairs, and I had to call to get them activated an hour on my cell phone with them
T:what takes so long to activate those things?
M:well, you have to call and give the card number and the serial numbers so they can be activated, and then they insist on walking you through the setup process on the screen...because they have to make sure you have an active signal at the end of it all...and you sit there for like 20 minutes before you find out the signal isn't working...
M:and then they say they will transfer you, but they hang up on you instead, but since there isn't any hold music, you sit there for ten minutes before you realize your phone is dead.
M:so you call back...and they try to take you through the same process of setting up, and then they ask you stupid questions that probably don't matter, like "where did you buy your receiver?"...
M:and then they tell you they're going to charge you nearly $200 to send a tech out
M:and then you slowly die on the inside.
M:I even got accused of "premature insertion" when I put the card in too early.