Saturday, December 18, 2004

Missing you....

I received a Christmas card in the mail from my grandparents yesterday. Inside grandma says, "We hope you're still with Matt". Either: 1. She really likes Matt, but has no faith in my ability to keep a man, or 2. She really likes Matt, and I'm not good at keeping in touch. Either way, my grandmother likes my boyfriend. Weeee!

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Helping hand

There should be a handle in women's restroom stalls. Nothing major - just a little handle on the inside of the door. Y'know, something for us "hoverers" to hold on to when we're going about our business. This would be especially helpful in bar restrooms. I don't know of many women who can do a balanced squat in high-heels after a few drinks. In my experience, it's a big ol' disaster.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Not only does she have a great personality....

Yesterday I was informed by someone I had just met that my pies precede me. That's fantastic! Spread the word, kids - I want everyone to know about my pies before they meet me!

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Pre-dinner entertainment

Scenario:
Woman enters the bus, and notices someone she recognizes; entertaining conversation ensues.

Her: (Yelling) Well Hello!
Him: Hey.
Her: (Yelling) Mind if I sit here?
Him: Nope.
Her: (Still yelling) Don't I know you from the nursing home?
Him: Yep.

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Get off my back!

Yeah, I haven't posted in forever....You haven't been able to keep up on my highly interesting life....You don't feel like you even know me anymore. So sorry.

I've been busy, alright? I would normally take a break from my incredibly productive work-day to entertain you all with the events of my daily my life, but things have gotten a little hectic.

Not only have I taken on more responsibilities at work, but earlier in the week management had moved all of the new trainees right near my desk, so I wasn't able to take my breaks at my desk any longer. I tried once. I had a line of people waiting to ask me a question during my lunch break. I told those people to go ask someone else for help, since I was on a break. More people came. When I sent them away, some of the first people came back to ask if I was done with my lunch yet.

On a positive note, I have all of my Christmas presents wrapped and ready to send off!

Friday, November 26, 2004

Open. Open. Open.

This morning when I arrived at work, at 7am, there were people standing in line waiting for Office Max to open. I'm not sure how long they had been waiting, and I don't know what time Office Max was scheduled to open it's doors, but the potential customers seemed quite content to stand in the cold, reading their "after Thanksgiving sale" ads.

I thought this sort of thing only happened in commercials. If this is the case with a store that doesn't have television ads reflecting such actions, can you imagine what Mervyns must be like???

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Girls Gone Wild: Uncut.

Matt was out of town this weekend, so I had the place to myself. It was weird and a little sad to not have him around, but I was determined to have a really nice "bachelorette" weekend.

Following are the components of my cra-ay-zee weekend:

- Redecorating in the livingroom
- Re-organization of the kitchen
- Baking - cookies and pies
- Bubble bath (with accompanying deep cleansing face mask)
- "Clueless" on VHS

Yeah bay-bee.

Thursday, November 18, 2004

Movin' on up

Matt bought some of those nose strips to reduce snoring. They look kinda goofy, but I think they may just take our relationship to another wonderful, rest-filled level.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

I'm so lucky

We were watching a movie the other night, when I heard sleeping noises next to me. My boyfriend had one eye partially open and his mouth was slightly agape, with his dry tongue sticking out a bit. As I surveyed the situation, I thought, "What's not to love?"

Saturday, November 13, 2004

For a good time

I received an amusing forwarded email string the other day; amusing because one of the people involved has a picture of themselves next to the auto signature at the end. It resembles a real estate agent's business card - If a real estate agent used Glamour Shots for their business needs. And it's at the end of each reply in the message. Following is the email conversation I had with the person who forwarded it to me:

Me: Heheh, scroll really fast. Weee!
Her: HA HA ….I smell a new entry in your blog!
Me (to myself): We are not cool.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Old friends

Sorry I haven't posted in so long; I'm having trouble accessing my blog. When I go to my blog page, I just get a nice big pink screen with no text. I just figured out that I can access my posting page by going through someone else's blog, so all is not lost - yet.

Sunday Matt and I went out for the day. Had a lovely lunch at Julia's on Capitol Hill, and then on to B&O Espresso for sour cream lemon pie - the best dessert on the hill. As we were walking out of B&O, I ran into Tasia.

Tasia was my neighbor 5 years ago, and we grew quite close. At the time, I worked the graveyard shift at work, and I would get home right about the time she was getting up for the day. She would invite me over for tea and "breakfast", which was bedtime tea for me, and earl grey for her, plus softboiled eggs for both of us. She even had cute little egg cups! Of course, you can't live in the same apartment for your entire life, so we both eventually moved away, and I haven't seen her since. I think about her all the time and wonder how she's doing, but I haven't had her number, so there was no way to check up on her.

It was such a pleasant surprise to see Tasia on Sunday - she's one of the few truly good people in the world, and I can't wait to hang out with her!

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

ARGH! Get out of my HEAD!!

I had bad dreams last night, which I suspect were spawned by PBS' election coverage. I was completely heartbroken this morning after waking from a dream about Matt. I found out that he was sleeping with Penelope Cruz on the side! When I got upset, he told me that I needed to learn to share. Apparently we lived with his mother, and she didn't make me feel much better. She said, "Yes, he probably shouldn't have had his other friend over when you were home, but really, you should calm down, dear."

Wine smoothies for breakfast, anyone?

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Listen to your kids - they know a thing or two!

Email from Mom regarding my 7 year old brother:

Nathan wants Bush to win but earlier he said he thinks Kerry is going to win because he wants to make medicare cost less. Hmmm. Interesting thing is neither Daniel or myself has even mentioned medicare! We've discussed Healthcare a few times but never medicare! So, either Nathan has been paying a lot closer attention to the news than we realized or he knows something :)


Only on Halloween

Scenario: 2 girls occupying a bathroom stall simultaneously.

G1: See this? This is scab blood!
G2: Cool.

Nice shoes; Wanna....?

I pulled out my bellydance costume for Halloween this year, and had a night on the town. While waiting at a bus stop to go home, a guy walks by and says "Nice shoes!". I thanked him for the compliment, then realized, "You can't see my shoes!"

Friday, October 29, 2004

How do you say "English" in French???

Steven is teaching himself French online at work...we seriously need some work around here.

Thursday, October 28, 2004

Those Chinese have it all figured out...

Should I be concerned by a tag that says "100% Genuine Faux Leather"?

Christmas comes but once a year

Traci took a trip to St. Louis for work last week, and came back with a present for little ol' me! Go to Ebay.com, and type "bra purse" into the search engine for a variety of examples similar to my present. Have I told you that Traci rocks???

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

These are a few of my favorite things...

1. Ridiculously long, scorching hot showers that leave the water heater empty.

2. Clay face masks and cucumber eye patches

3. Red wine

4. Charlie Brown holiday specials airing on ABC

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

I made it!

Matt's mom likes my chicken pot pie. I'm so in.

Saturday, October 23, 2004

That had to hurt...

Matt and I went to "Shaun of The Dead" last night...Possibly the goriest movie I have ever seen. Go see it!

Thursday, October 21, 2004

Drinking at work 101

Email from Matt - working out the evening's plans:

We will fly to Italy fueled by the juice of three onions. We shall land in Tuscany, where we can snack on young parmesan. We will grab some wine, and burrow through the Earth's crust to deepest, darkest Africa. We will love green things, and taste bright colors. The spectrum will span from honey to molasses. We will evaporate into the ether and we will drink people's dreams like wine. There will be much rejoicing. There will be no pain.

Saturday, October 16, 2004

In the words of Paris Hilton...

I'm going to a friend's birthday party tonight, and I thought I might get all dolled up for the occasion. I had to work today, so I brought all the provisions in. Make-up, heels, strappy velvet dress, cute jacket...

It was cold this morning, so I bundled up in a cozy turtleneck, jeans and thick socks. I now have "sock tread" on my legs, to go with my snazzy dress. That's hot.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

I have a new suit!

Ever notice that pants with back zippers feel like they're going on backwards? It's not just the zipper...they're shaped backwards. Eeew.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

People actually buy this???

I normally shop alone, because...Well, girls are lame. But Traci's different - I suspect that she's some sort of imposter girl, because I have a really nice time with her. Traci - YOU ROCK.

In any case...Imposter or no imposter, Traci and I went shopping last night. I suspect that in the end, I had a better time than she did, but I won't go into it, because it was that in-between time that was great.

We went to Ross for our shopping extravaganza, a store that I loathe in most cases. You can't FIND anything there! They are so freakin' unorganized, that I usually get frustrated and just leave. My biggest irritation is finding really great shoes, only to learn that they should be in a section for shoes that are two sizes smaller. Ghah!!!

Initially the trip was pretty uneventful...Until we reached the underwear...There are some crazy undies out there, people! There was this tiny pink see-thru thong, with - get this - pompons hanging off the back. These are not panties that you wear. These are panties that guys buy, so they can hang them on their bedroom wall. I'm sure they make for a great tale of conquest, but please please keep them out of my garment selection!

On second thought...Don't. They were really funny.

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

New email moment!

From Mom:

Earlier Daniel started talking about how we should have Chun King for dinner tonight. Ew!!! Then he decided to turn up the radio which was playing a Dwight Yoakum song. Eeww! Eeww!
We are NOT having Chun King for dinner tonight and we are NOT listening to Dwight Yoakum during the dinner hour! EW!


You done been schooled!

Last weekend Matt and I were scooting around W. Seattle, when we became stuck at a stop light next to a car of highschool kids.

HK to us: Scooter. Scooooo-ter! Woo-hoo! Scoooooooter!!! Yeah! (etc...)

Matt to me: Yeah, I'm riding a scooter - with a hot chick on the back. He's in a car, with 2 other dudes.

Saturday, October 09, 2004

I'm Number 1!!!

I won! I won!!! I won the Mr. T video that I posted in an earlier entry! I'm so excited...We do a Secret Santa gift exchange every year at work - my recipient is going to be so lucky!

Final Thoughts

In Bush's closing statement of last night's debate, he said that he has a 10 year plan which will end our dependence on foreign energy.

He seems to be well on his way toward fulfilling that promise already. How many more countries do you suppose he can take over in 10 years?

Friday, October 08, 2004

Sucka' fool!

Everyone must bid on my new favorite Ebay item!

Email of the day!

Today's email conversation with Matt:

Me:After work today, can you please run to the store? I need a few packages of semisweet chocolate chips, and a few packages of reeces peanut butter chips. Oh, and a bag of cotton balls. Also, a few packages of shortening sticks.

Thank you.

Matt:Mmmnnnn... Cotton ball cookies!

Me: Hmm, yeah, I guess I should've saved that one for the end of my list, huh?

Saturday, October 02, 2004

Movin' on up

They've replaced the tampon/pad dispensers in the women's restrooms at work. Now there isn't anywhere to put your quarter. You pull the knob, and the item of your choice flies out. I see you with that blank stare - yeah you. Don't you realize what I'm saying? FREE TAMPONS. Sheesh.

Friday, October 01, 2004

I love The Stranger

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 26 The week ends with more punishment for Florida, as Jeanne, the fourth hurricane in six weeks, sliced across the state, reravaging areas recently traumatized by hurricanes Ivan and Frances and killing at least five people. Until today, the Associated Press reports, no state had suffered a four-hurricane pounding in one season since Texas in 1886--which proves one thing: God watched the last election. Condolences to the extravagantly victimized people of Florida, all praise to God and His vengeful weather.

I HATE bugs!!!

I had bug dreams last night. Lots of them. The most memorable were the one about the bees and the one about the spiders.

The bees had built a nest outside my front door. The damn pests kept getting in the house somehow! I couldn't leave the house! I had to call in sick for fear of being swarmed if I went outside!

The spiders were all over inside my house! I literally couldn't leave my bed because the floor was moving, there were so many of them! The cats and I were chillin' on the bed, trying to figure out what to do, when they started climbing up the bed posts, onto the mattress. I called 911, but eventually just climbed out the window next to my bed.

I think the presidential debate affected my sleep. More on that later.

Simple pleasures

This morning a woman got onto the bus with her toddler son. He was very excited about all of the semi trucks that he was seeing on his bus ride, and yelled out every time he saw one. "A truck! Another truck! I see another truck, Mommy!" I love it when kids get so excited about stuff, especially when they pronounce their "tr's" as "f's".

Thursday, September 30, 2004

I might be watching too much television.

This morning I was in the middle of a dream, and then out of the blue, there was the image of that creepy kid meowing, from the preview of that new Sarah Michelle Gellar horror movie, The Grudge. Then I woke up to my cat fighting outside my bedroom window. Eew.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

No pun intended...

I'm trying to come up with an interesting idea for a birthday dinner that I'm hosting on Monday. I was thinking about doing one of my favorite ideas - cornish hens stuffed with jambalaya. (Thank you Kenny for the idea...If anyone wants my recipe, just let me know). The only problem with this recipe is that after eating an entire hen stuffed with jambalaya, there's no room for dessert. Trust me, dessert will be amazing. SO....I figured I could use those little tiny baby fryer chickens instead! I would have to set a bowl of extra jambalaya on the table, obviously, but two tiny chickens on a plate would make for a really fun presentation...Maybe a thin gravy drizzled on the plate as well.

I've never done anything with baby fryer chickens, so I decided to consult my good friend Yahoo for ideas. I caught myself just before hitting "search", when I realized that I had typed "baby fryer" into the search field. After momentary mortification, I thought, "Oh, what the hell." Nothing interesting came up. Apparently Yahoo doesn't have a sense of humor.

Anyone in the mood for a little Steppenwolf?

Yesterday Sean said that I rock socks. And THEN....This morning on the way into work, Matt and I were behind a truck with a license plate that said "GRSYRDR". It's going to be a great weekend.

Die pink, DIE!

Last night I got my hair cut and colored. It's brown now, or chestnut, I should say. My hair now matches my eyebrows; if you haven't seen my hair lately, this is a big accomplishment. This morning I woke up and found a poem that Matt had written for me:

The New Beatitudes

Blessed are the hairstylists
For they know the truth
That you cannot cut strand by strand
But in swathes and ribbons
As if hair was woven by strands of imagination

Blessed are the comb-makers,
The metallurgists,
Who provide the tools that add texture.

Blessed are those who mix the shampoos
Who blend the pomades, the conditioners
And hair gel.
Blessed are the makers of barbicide.

And blessed am I
Who watch you emerge from
Nylon sheets and plastic hair nets
Like beams of moonlight on my face
As you discard your shadowy veil.

You pay the girl and walk to me.
You smile at me.
You take my hand
And we walk out together.
Pixies lean against my ears and remind me:
I am blessed. I am blessed!

Friday, September 24, 2004

And you thought I was cool before...

My dad drives a truck for a living, and he was in town today so I met him for lunch. He happened to drive through Sturgis during the bike rally, so he bought me some biker shirts to wear on the scooter. One of them is white with a flame painted on the front. It says "Highway Hottie".

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

You are the least helpful person ever.

Here's the conversation I had with the gentleman behind the meat counter yesterday:

Me: I would like 4lbs of lamb cut into stew meat please.
Him: Sure. What would you like?
Me: Shoulder would be great.
Him: Well, I can cut shoulder for you, but you're not going to get very much meat, and you'll have to pay for the steaks anyway...
Me: Okay, how 'bout shank or rib?
Him: Mmm, that's not a good idea either.
Me: Alright, what would you recommend???
Him: Probably leg. You would get lots of good stew meat from the leg.
Me: That sounds great.
Him: We don't have any right now.

Saturday, September 18, 2004

A special kind of "cool"

This morning Matt gave me a ride into work on the back of his moped scooter. It was raining, so I wore my leather chaps. Matt wore his bright green rain pants. We rocked the party.

Friday, September 17, 2004

Save it for the shower

If you're one of those people who sit in the back of the bus and sing aloud with your headphones on, please stop. To the best of my knowledge, no one was given a special "exception" pass which would allow them to sound good while singing with headphones on! Just don't do it.

"Pie and Pastry Bible", you are the DEVIL!

Matt gave me a new cookbook last Christmas, called "The Pie and Pastry Bible", and I've learned to loath it. It's very difficult to read, being that the author sends you to several different sections during the course of a recipe. If you're baking a tart, you have to go to one section for the main recipe, then she sends you somewhere else to read about the crust. While you're reading about the crust, you have to go to another section about pan preparation!

My hatred acquired a new level the other day when I wanted to see how her pie crust recipe compares to mine. I looked up "Pie Crust" in the index, which directed me to "See Crusts". "Crusts" directed me to "See Flaky Pie Crust". "Flaky Pie Crust" directed me to "See Basic Flaky Pie Crust". Does anyone else see a problem here???

Thursday, September 16, 2004

Miscellaneous pictures and bringing back the great phrases

I just sent a bunch of film into Snapfish.com for developing/online posting. I had 5 rolls of vacation photos, and 5 more rolls that were just floating around in my camera bag. When I received notification that my photos were posted and my prints were in the mail, I didn't waste any time in going to the website - I wanted to see how the vacation shots turned out, and also to see what was on all of those mystery rolls! The vacation photos turned out really well (if you're not in my immediate family, please let me know if you want an invite to the album, as I might not remember to send the link to you!), and I was happy to see that the mystery film consisted of pictures from a few football games, and some family visits. I was happily perusing my pictures when I suddenly became completely confused. At the end of one of my albums is a photo that I don't remember taking. It was obviously taken in downtown Seattle, on a rainy day. I'm looking at a stack of soggy couch cushions in the middle of the sidewalk. I've added that picture to the end of all my photo albums. Because really, what's a photo album without soggy couch cushions?

In other news, someone told me that they like my blog, and I said "Oh goody!"

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Yes!

Matt and I went out and saw Garden State. You must see this movie. Now. Oh, and buy the soundtrack too.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Blame it on the rain

Apparently there's a bit of a sandpit next to the driveway at my mother's house, and the kids like to build sand castles there after it rains. According to Mom's email, the most recent attempt was a bit of a failure:

The kids just returned. They destroyed their earlier creation, declared it a disaster, saying Ivan did it and now they need to start all over.


Friday, September 10, 2004

An offer I *almost* can't refuse...

Here's today's email from Mom:

You want a couple kids? I was on the verge of calling the police a little bit ago. We finished school and told the kids they were going to get baths in a little bit. We then let them go outside to play for a few before bathtime. Daniel went in, got the tub ready then headed out to call the kids in. I waited a few then went out to see what was taking so long. Looked around, didn't see anyone so started calling out. Daniel came walking up the drive, saying he was looking for them. Huh? He went one way, I went another calling thier names. No sign of them. I was getting desperate! I even looked in the freezer! Everything was so quiet! Finally I thought something must have happened and we would need to call the police. I yelled out as loud as I could "NATHAN!!" It was then that I heard giggling and they came down from their hiding spot in the trees saying they didn't want to take a bath. They haven't gotten a lecture like they did then in a long time!

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

i No Molestar Los Animales !

In Yellowstone, they have warning signs for different perils, which all feature the same kid. There was one about the dangers of buffalo gorings. The image was of this child, being thrown through the air by a buffalo, baseball cap flying in one direction, and camera off in another. We went to check out the canyon, and there was a warning sign about staying on the trails. Same kid, falling off a cliff; same baseball cap and camera flying through the air behind him. I totally want to see him on warning signs for alligators or sharks or something.

Saturday, September 04, 2004

Part 3: The Picture Book

As Anna sat in the high back chair, she thought about what she had done, as her mother had instructed. She really hadn’t thought it was such a big deal to be playing with the glass angels in the china hutch. She supposed that mother had gotten so angry because they had been grandmother’s. She couldn’t help it, though. Every day she looked at those angels on the top shelf, and admired their beauty. She played with them nearly every day after school, before mother got home from work. Today mother had come home early; just early enough to catch her with all of them on the floor around her. Of course, knowing what horrible punishment it was, mother sent her to sit in the uncomfortable chair in the corner of the front room.

No longer able to analyze the situation, her gaze began to wander about the room, looking over things that she always looked over when she was sent to the corner. There was the piano, which mother made her stand at and sing while she played various songs. During birthdays and Christmas, they would all gather around and sing songs. Of course, mother had a terrible voice, so it was never much of a treat, but she always insisted, saying it was tradition.

ON the floor next to her chair sat two jugs. They weren’t anything special; just two plain, glass jugs, which were about the size of milk bottles, perhaps a bit larger. She never knew where they came from and thought they were actually rather ugly, but mother always insisted on keeping them there. Perhaps this was also part of her strategic punishment; making her sit by ugly bottles.

Across the room was the glass door, which led to the dining room. Anna loved to sit in that room as much as possible and look outside. They lived on the fourth floor, so it was a wonderful view of the people below and the park across the street. Sometimes after sitting at the windows all afternoon, she would turn around to see mother standing in the door way with tears in her eyes. She would never give details as to why she was crying, though, always saying something about memories of grandmother.

Next to the glass door was one of grandmother’s old bookshelves. Anna missed her so, and had immediately started reading the books on the shelf, as soon as she had been shown grandmother’s favorites. She was quite the reader at such a young age, so she heard mother and many of her friends commenting. She didn’t know much about that, but she did love to read. She was currently in the midst of a wonderful novel called The Merchant of Venice. Mother didn’t approve much of this book, but let her read it anyway. She had begged and wailed when mother said she didn’t want Anna r3eading the book. Anna was torn, as mother had just finished telling her that this had been grandmother’s very favorite. Finally mother consented, saying that she could read it, but not all at once; she had to read just a bit every day. Anna could sit all-day and read for hours, many times finishing entire novels in one day. She was about halfway through this one and understood why mother hadn’t wanted her reading all of it at once. It was a very intense novel, full of violence and revenge.

The more she thought about this book, the more she wanted to be reading it right now. She knew that she shouldn’t as mother had instructed her not to move from the chair until she was called to dinner. Also, she had already read part of it that day, and she knew the rules. Unfortunately, Anna was quit the troublemaker, even she knew that. So, with mother in the kitchen preparing dinner, Anna sneaked across the room to the shelf and quietly stole the book, running back to her seat to read. She became so caught up in the story that she hadn’t noticed on of her stockings falling below her knee, or mother calling her for dinner.

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Part 2: Two Jugs

I was overwhelmed with the loneliness of the room. Just days before I had been in this place, packing my grandmother’s belongings, in preparation for the Salvation Army crew. Now a devastatingly different atmosphere greeted me. The air no longer carried my grandmother’s scent. Now just dust and emptiness.

Unknowingly, the previous group who had been here had violated this space, taking with them not only the belongings of the deceased, but also bits and pieces of her memory. Looking around I tried to remember what it was like before, but I couldn’t. Much like a new hair cut, the prior feeling was hard to recall.

Turning around, I spotted the only thing left in the room. There were two glass jugs sitting in a corner of the room, just under the reflection from the window on the other wall. The emptiness of the room was magnified by this reflection, as normally a couch or chair would interrupt the light; now it was a perfect reflection of the window, outlined by shadows from the panes. Of course, this was the only source of light in the room; all of her lamps with their cheery light were gone as well.

I stared at the two jugs for a bit longer, hoping to gain something from them, I suppose. Perhaps they have some memory bottled up inside of them that I’d forgotten about. No memories. Now this would be the first new memory in my grandmother’s apartment. The first of many, I was sure. My daughter, now eight years old, was always getting into some sort of mischief, so I figured that she would contribute greatly.

I began to walk about the empty living space, trying to imagine where I would put things. My thoughts kept mirroring my grandmother’s, knowing that she would still be here; hot wanting to disappoint her. Of course, I would most likely put the things that I had inherited back where they were to begin with. It would make everyone feel more at home.

As I turned to leave I thought, “Yes, the jugs will stay right where they’re at.”

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Part 1: Silence

I walked into the old apartment that my grandmother had kept for most of her life. She had lived many years, and undoubtedly had many treasures hidden in her home. As I was the only remaining relative, she had left everything to me in her will. I was anxious to see the stories that her life had to tell; however, I also realized that she had collected a lot of things that didn’t tell a story; just junk. I knew that the task at hand would be a big one.

When I walked into the front room, I was overwhelmed with memories. The air still smelled of her cheap, imposter perfume. She’s always worn so much of it, perhaps because her senses were dull, and she didn’t realize how strong it really was. In any case, she always smelled as if she’d marinated in the stuff all night. Shelves of dusty books, which hadn’t been touched since before her eyes began to fail, lined the walls, floor to ceiling. They had all been dearly loved at one point, and the ones that were still close to her hear until the very end were all in one spot, not nearly so neglected looking as the others. I remembered how I used to come over every afternoon and read to her when I got out of class. She would always ask for one of the same five that she’d always asked for. She loved Shakespeare, and The Merchant of Venice was one of her favorites. She loved the aspects of revenge in this tale, and she would request it time and time again. There were many times that I would have just finished it the day before, and she would ask to hear it again.

Between the two shelves was a small piano, which had lived a fulfilling life as well. The top of the bench opened to reveal many of the songs that I had sung and danced to in my younger years. I remembered Christmas and birthdays in which we’d all gather around like so many of the families in the old Christmas movies.

Near the piano sat the old china hutch. I looked through the glass to see the memories that this piece of furniture held. The old Dutch characters and angels made of glass that I used to play with. Mother never liked me to play with them, as they were so fragile, but when she wasn’t looking, grandmother would hand them to me, winking with her mischievous grin. There were the crystal wineglasses that the adults would use during family dinners. If I had been good, grandma would let me drink grape juice out of one, so I looked just like all the others.

My sight moved across the room to the dining area. This was her favorite part of the humble apartment. There was a glass paned door that led into the room from the front area, and the entire dining room was enclosed in this same paned glass pattern. She would sit in there for hours, just looking through the glass as if she were dreaming of days past when she could walk downstairs on her own and feel the sun’s rays, uninterrupted by the glass.

I let these memories saturate my brain, as I began to go through her things. I sorted out the things I wanted, knowing that the rest would be shipped to The Salvation Army the next afternoon. I was excited to move in next week, and start the new memories.

Saturday, August 21, 2004

Vacation!

I'm going on vacation after today, and will be gone for 2 weeks. I'm going to pre-post a few things...short stories to keep you all captivated until I get back. I'm setting the dates in the future, so don't freak out if there's something in here with a date of next week! Feel free to read them all now, but don't blame me if you're bored in a few days.

A lesson in modern technology

Matt's mother just got a new cell phone when she moved to Seattle, and I think it may be time to give her a lesson on things like setting up her voicemail box, which she hasn't done yet, and maybe show her how to save (or not save) a number. Matt had to call her from my cell phone the other day, because his had died. Apparently she saved my number as his! I don't mind her having my number - she's a lovely woman, but yesterday I had multiple voicemails which started out, "Matt, this is Mom...". I had to keep sending him office emails to forward the information from her messages.

Up until this morning, it was not a big deal, even amusing at times.

I set my alarm via my cell phone. Matt has an alarm clock on the night stand, and there simply isn't enough room for another alarm clock. That, and my phone vibrates when the alarm goes off, so between the beeping and the buzzing, I wake up to it every time. This morning my alarm went off and I just reached over and blindly turned it off. A little while later, I rolled over to see what time it was, and I realized that according to the clock, my alarm shouldn't have gone off yet. About this time, Matt starts mumbling something about how he was supposed to meet his mother, and she was probably wondering where he was. At this, I grabbed my phone and looked at my call history. "Crap! That wasn't my alarm going off, that was the phone ringing! I hung up on your mother!"

I'm betting I won't be getting a 7:30am call from Maureen again any time soon.

Thursday, August 19, 2004

The calm before the storm?

There haven't been any interesting scenarios this week, so I don't have much to say. I'm pretty sure this is a good thing, considering the usual events in my life. Matt and I are going camping next week - so I'll try to have a super-long blog entry on Saturday, to keep you over until I return.

Saturday, August 14, 2004

A new perspective

My eight year old nephew is staying at our house for the weekend, and we're having a great time sofar. Last night Justin took a shower before bed, and came out to say goodnight wearing khaki shorts and a button up dress shirt.

Me: Justin, why are you wearing that?
Justin: This is what I'm wearing tomorrow.
Me: I get that, but why are you wearing it now?
Justin: Mom didn't pack any pajamas for me.
Me: Huh. Well, you can't be comfortable in that; why don't you wear one of Matt's Tshirts?
Justin: No, this is fine.

He then proceeded to pull the blankets back and crawl into bed, wearing belt and all. My nephew is a freaky kid.

This morning Justin came out of bed ready made! Matt made blueberry pancakes for breakfast. Afterwards, I mentioned something about brushing teeth, and Justin just looked at me.

Me: Lemme guess, you're mom didn't pack a toothbrush for you?
Justin: Yeah! (giggle)
Me: Well, we just need to pick one up for you today.
Justin: She packed a sweater for me.
Me: Yeah, I saw that. A nice knit sweater - perfect for winter, but no toothbrush. Next time I'm sending your mom a checklist.

Friday, August 13, 2004

Please excuse the mess...

My sister is coming up to drop my nephew off for the weekend, and our house is a disaster.

We had borrowed her steam cleaner for our living room carpet, and we have to return it this weekend while my sister is up. We've had the cleaner for over a month, and of course, we just got around to using it last night. At 8:30. I have to say, it looked great when Matt was done. I found it pretty amusing however, when he called me in to express his confusion that the carpet was wet. Apparently he thought that the cleaner would suck enough water back up that the carpeting would be dry when he was done, so he had moved all our stuff outside, thinking it would be moved right back when he was finished. All of the livingroom furniture is currently in my kitchen and dining room, waiting to be moved back after work.

Maybe my sister will help move it all back!

Thursday, August 12, 2004

A little piece of heaven

I finally broke down and ordered a Frappuccino at Starbucks today. I used to get the vanilla ones on occasion, but I stopped when I was forced to admit to the nutritional value of them. Well, today I decided to try the new vanilla bean creme frappuccino, and wow is it yummy! Remember when you were a kid, and you would eat frosting straight out of the plastic container? Well, I don't. I don't think we ever had store-bought frosting as kids, but I can imagine what it was like. The vanilla bean creme frappuccino is even better than eating frosting straight out of the plastic container! (or what I imagine it to be like) Props to Mom for making store bought frosting something that I have to imagine, and props to Starbucks for their tasty beverages!

Tuesday, August 10, 2004

MY toy!

I bought the coolest toy for my younger brother's birthday! I found a space shuttle with a docking station! It also has two spacemen and a little space truck! The package arrived last week, and I just got around to wrapping it and shipping it off to him today, but not without playing with it first! The other night Matt was making dinner, and I came in with the box, looking for a knife.

Matt: What'cha doin'?
Me: I'm gonna play with Nathan's new toy!
Matt: Wha- No, Kim, put it down.
Me: (cutting through the tape)What?
Matt: You're going to break it before you even send it to him!
Me: No I won't, silly. I think I can figure out how to - wow! The doors of the shuttle open! Ooh, and there's a little arm thing that comes out! Neat!
Matt: Kim, put it back in the box!
Me: No! I want to look at it! I'm "testing" it.
Matt: Silence.
Me: Ooh! The truck has a satellite dish thingie on top!
Matt: We can get you one of your own if you'd like.
Me: Actually, it is pretty cool...Okay, I'm going to put it away now.

Saturday, August 07, 2004

Hmm...

In reviewing previous posts on my blog, I've come to the conclusion that my life reads alot like an I Love Lucy episode.

Actually, I just lied right there. I was telling Pamela about my harrowing, near-getting-stuck-on-the-shelf-in-my-closet experience (see below), and she told me that my life plays out like an I Love Lucy episode.

Makes one wonder why I was blessed with the ability to reproduce, huh?

I wish I didn't always have an amusing story to tell

Matt and I keep the bedroom door closed, so that the cats don't molest my clothing and bedspread, leaving a trail of cat hair behind. This morning I learned the dangers of having a push-button lock on your bedroom door. We're still trying to figure out who is responsible, but I do know one thing: After my shower, I couldn't get dressed because the bedroom door was locked. I tried jamming a pen in the little hole on the outside, and I even tried sliding an old atm card down the space between the door and the frame. Nothing worked. It was time to channel MacGyver.

Our house has 2 bedrooms, which sit side by side, and they "share" a closet. When you look into the closet for one room, you realize that you're looking at half a closet. You can see over the wooden barrier, into the other half of the closet, and into the other room. I think at one time, the two bedrooms were a walk-thru of sorts.

So, Matt boosted me, wearing only a bathrobe, up to the shelf in the closet of the room that we could still access. I managed to turn myself around so that I wouldn't have to dive face first out of the other side, and did this cramped scoot sortof thing until I got to the other side. I looked down - man that's a ways up for someone who's afraid of heights! I started to slide down, and about halfway there, I realized that if I were to continue, I would end up with a bunch of hangers in my face, which could prove painful. I actually managed to pull myself back up onto the closet shelf, leaned over, and started removing clothing from the closet, and throwing it on the floor. I found a box on the shelf, which I proceeded to drop on the floor, so I wouldn't have to drop as far. Then I turned around again, and braced my feet on either side of the door frame. I scootched myself down with my feet, until my arms and chin were the only thing holding me to the shelf, then dropped.

It was a good morning.

Friday, August 06, 2004

Relief sets in.

My mother had emailed me complaining of dry red patches on her skin, asking if I had any recommendations. I suggested she try a good moisturizer and drinking more water. Matt was standing nearby when I read the first part of her response:

Mom: Well, we have a little vaseline laying around and some lotion we picked up for Lindsay awhile back.
Me: Eew!
Matt: What?
Mom: Maybe I'll try the lotion and save the vaseline for Lindsay when her lips start drying out.
Me: Oh, good!
Matt: What??
Me: Oh, nothing. I thought mom was going to put vaseline on her face, but it turns out she's not.
Matt: Oh.

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Someone out there is reading!

I have comments! I LOVE comments! Thank you, Traci - you're the best ever!

It can only get better from here

I have these great pants that I haven't worn in awhile, and I decided to give them a "comeback moment" today for work. Unfortunately said "comeback moment" has turned into several not so pleasant moments. Please take my advice, and try old favorites on before you wear them out in public.

1. I think my behind and thighs have gotten a bit larger, because my pants don't quite fit right anymore. Sure, they look alright on, but the pockets won't stay put! The pants have buttons on both sides, above the pockets, to create a bit of a "sailor" look. They're very cute, but if they don't fit just right, the pocket insides pooch out. I have to walk around with my hands in my pockets so that I don't look lame.

2. The pants lace up the back, and the laces are really long, so they hang down, kindof like a tail. It sounds silly, now that I've typed it out, but trust me, they're great. They're a nice charcoal color, so they work just fine for the office. I like to call it "office flair". I learned the importance of not forgetting previous wardrobe malfunctions today. I went to the restroom, and just before I proceeded to let go of my willpower, I looked into that little space between the edge of the seat and my crotch, and lo and behold, there were my laces. In the water. Timing is everything, girls.

Who knew that it was possible to curse in silence? Probably a good thing. Can you imagine sitting in an office restroom, occupying the stall next to a woman who suddenly starts yelling vulgarities? It would probably freak the average girl out.

Needless to say, I grabbed toilet paper as fast as I could, and started attempting to dry my laces. As previously stated, the laces are charcoal in color. Yes, you guessed it, there were little bits of white toilet paper all over my laces. Damn. I proceeded to finish my business, then grabbed paper towels to do the job. They don't leave as much behind as toilet paper does.

3. I finally got back to my desk, and proceeded to do my work. At one point I looked down. I don't know what caused me to look down, but now I'm glad I did. I will be keeping my legs crossed for the remainder of the day. The seam is coming apart. The hem isn't coming loose, and a button isn't coming off, no. The seam on the upper thigh of my left leg is coming loose. Beautiful.


Saturday, July 31, 2004

Hey guys! Guys??

Where are Nate and Brian? We miss you! Happy hour has been nonexistent since you left. Send an email!

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Fellow bloggers beware!

As my good friend Traci has learned, if I reap enjoyment from reading your blog, I will harass you if it doesn't get updated!  Lucky for Traci, we work together, so I can send her really neat Outlook meeting planners with "update your blog" requests. 

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Dangerous desires

I was sitting at my desk this afternoon and acquired an enormous craving for cheddar/sour cream Ruffles (they have ridges, y'know).  Of course, the vending machine on my floor was all out, so I ran down to the 3rd floor to grab a bag.  On the way back up the stairs, one of my sandals caught on a step, and I went down with a squeak and a thud.  Two "suits" were standing by the stairwell, and they just turned to stare at me while I re-composed myself. 

Yes, it hurt a little.  My toes, knees, hands and pride are all a little bruised.  But, damn those chips were worth it. 



Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Another chance meeting.

Matt took me to a very nice dinner for my birthday on Saturday.  If you're ever in Seattle and want a treat, go here.

We were walking across the street to the restaurant, and I had a highly entertaining conversation with a woman who was walking in the opposite direction:

Her - Nice dress.
Me - Thank you.
Her - You're welcome, Bitch!

The moment that last word exited her mouth, I recognized her.  I looked right at Matt and said, "Wow!  I've run into her before!  I remember her complimenting me on something, and then calling me a bitch!". 

That moment totally made my birthday.

Friday, July 23, 2004

I could do this all day

Go here when Tetris just won't cut it anymore.

Thursday, July 22, 2004

I giggle every time!

I was just reading through some old email and ran across one that Matt send me last year; I had just informed him that I would be in a new-hire orientation all week:

Orientation is one of the upcoming challenges on the next Fear Factor. The last person awake wins $50,000. The rest have to eat bees.

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

I want pie NOW!

This is my new favorite website.

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

In my opinion...

1.  If you take an infant to a movie theatre, you are a bad parent.
 
2.  If you let and infant cry through the entire movie, you are a bad movie-goer. 

3.  If you take a toddler to a horror movie when they are old enough to understand the images on the screen, you are even worse.


Saturday, July 17, 2004

And she's at it again...

Do you think  I would still have health coverage if I acquired carpal tunnel from playing Tetris at work?

Hmm

This morning at breakfast, Matt and I had one of our more entertaining conversations.
 
Me: So, what would you do if I suddenly went crazy one day, and I became one of those ladies who walks around downtown and yells at people for no apparent reason?
 
Him: I would throw you away.
 
Me: Huh.
 
Him: No, I would have you admitted into a mental institution.  No, wait!  I would just make sure that you were really hopped up on drugs all the time!
 
Me: You're having a lot of fun with this, aren't you?
 
Him:  What would you do if I became one of those guys who walked around the neighborhood with my robe falling open, mumbling to myself?
 
Me: Eat your toast.

You learn something new every day!

So, we called the plumber back about our sink issue yesterday.  It turns out that sometimes when a plumber does really intense work, such as replacing a bunch of pipes, the disruption can cause rust and deposits to drop into the lines, and when you turn on the water, all of that stuff gets flushed to the end of the faucet, blocking the water flow.  Sure enough, Matt removes the end of the faucet, and there's a bunch of crusty crap in the filter.  This is a good thing to know, considering the calls I get at work! 

Friday, July 16, 2004

Hug your local plumber (or make him come back when he makes things worse)

I'm not a big fan of showering at work.  My home shower drain was getting pretty slow, so like a good consumer, I used drain cleaner on Monday.  Tuesday I followed the directions on the bottle, and tried drain cleaner a second time.  Nothing. I found out yesterday that most of the time, drain cleaner crystallizes, and completely stops up your drain.  Wish I had known that on Monday or Tuesday.   Wednesday I snaked the drain.  Yesterday a plumber came out, and worked under the house, replacing most of the horrendously old plumbing.  I had a nice collection of pipes sitting by my garbage can when he was done, 3 hours later.  Apparently there was years of nastiness built up in the plumbing...Makes me wonder if my landlord ever had maintenance done. 
 
After the plumber left, Matt and I were having a lovely time playing with the tub water, watching it go down the drain, in amazement.  Then we turned the sink faucet on, and noted that hot and cold were both coming out in barely a trickle...time to call our local plumber again.
 
On a positive note, I felt incredibly lucky to have a gym at work with a shower this week .





Thursday, July 15, 2004

Mental Note:

In the future, if I'm trying to drink out of a large bottle, I will be more careful if it's mostly empty.  I think if practice this, I'll avoid dousing myself with water.

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

The adventures of Adventure Cat: Part II

An excerpt from today's "Mom" email:

Adventure Cat was quite upset with us late yesterday afternoon. We decided to change her bedding for her. The kids and I removed the kittens and Adventure cat then I quickly placed a clean sheet in for them before replacing the kittens. Adventure Cat was big time miffed! She mewed and threw quite the tizzy. She then moved the kittens to an undesirable spot where we had plastic bags stored. Then she got mad because we removed the plastic bags and put the kittens back in their original home. After yelling at all of us then yelling real loud at Nathan and chasing him away from the area she moved one kitten to a small box that really wasn't even big enough for just her. She then proceeded to lay on top of the kitten and refused to budge! I got another box together for her and moved it under the chair near where she wanted to be and placed the kitten in it. She hopped in and seemed content until the other kittens started crying for her. She then poked her head out and mewed at me so I brought the others to her. They're all happily abiding in their new home and we will wait plenty of time before attempting to change the bedding for her again.

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

The adventures of Adventure Cat!

An email from Mom:

Later in the day I headed out to the garden to see how it was going. Out came the kids all excited. Adventure Cat was going to have babies and Daddy was having problems. I came back in and found Daniel on his hands and knees trying to extract Adventure Cat from a less than desirable area. We finally, after much coaxing and rearranging convinced her to settle for a better spot. That poor cat had one heck of a time! At one point, shortly before popping the first one out somehow managed to jump out of her box and come looking for me. That poor cat could barely keep her hind end off the floor! She was squatting, having contractions and begging me to help to help her. We managed to get her back in the box then the kids and I took turns keeping her company. Lindsay saw the first two being born and Nathan and I saw the last one being born. A most painful experience for the new Mama. Last night she kept trying to take little breaks but every time she'd take a couple steps away the kittens would start crying. She was actually grumbling (almost a growl) on her way back a couple times. LOL Grrrr, durn kids! She was thrilled to see us all emerge from the bedroom this morning and immediately came out to get us and lead us back to her box so we could take turns keeping her company again.

Saturday, July 10, 2004

Breakfast in a hurry...

I just went to the restroom, and saw something interesting. There was a random trail of raisin bran leading to the end stall. Said stall is nick-named the "poo stall", on account of the fact that it's out of the way, so it's where the girls go to, well...you know.

I'm strangely relieved that there weren't milk spills on the floor.

Wishful thinking...

So, I was in the shower this morning, and thought...

What if I baked cookies for John Kerry? I could send him a batch of chocolate chip, or maybe peanut butter, with a little note, wishing him luck on the election. THEN...he would call me up and tell me how wonderful the cookies were, and ask me to be his "election baker". My first assignment would be to bake a gagillion cookies for his next public speech. I would have to decline, "That's a really great offer senator, but my little kitchen simply can't handle that much business at once". "Not to worry, my dear!" He would respond, "You can move into my mansion where we'll build you a large commercial kitchen, and we also plan to provide you with an assistant baker."

Wow...that was a really good daydream...I just added the assistant part in while I was typing this.

Thursday, July 08, 2004

An email from mom

Below is an excerpt from an email that I received from my mother. She is remarried with two small kids, whom she is teaching to read:

First stop was the cigarette store. Daniel ran in while the kids and I waited in the car. While he was in there a pickup pulled up and parked next to it. It had a decal on the side which Nathan immediately set to reading. "GGG Go-o-o-od, God! BBB-Bl-Bl-ble-ble-bless,Bless! God Bless! Aa ammm-ammmeee-amerrriiii-amerriic-amerriic-amerriicaaa-America! God Bless America!" He's an American! Lindsay then chimed in "He's an American! He has an American car! See! He has an American Flag!" They were both so excited to be parked next to an American with an American car! When he came out I was tempted to thank him for keeping my kids busy :-)

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Oops!

My daily routine consists of receiving calls from restaurants with facilities issues...Anything from plumbing to air conditioning problems. If it can fall apart, they call me about it. I generally try to do basic troubleshooting over the phone (don't touch the blue wire), and if we can't fix it, I dispatch a technician to go take a look. I was perusing through some old calls, and I came across this one:

Plumbing - Women's restroom sink ripped off the wall. Store saw a man and a woman enter the bathroom, then heard a loud crash shortly thereafter. No water leaks.

John Kerry speaks in Ohio

Courtesy of b-may and My Way News:

"We've got better vision, better ideas, real plans. We've got a better sense of what's happening to America - and we've got better hair."

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

A letter to my cat

Hey there, Cricket.

So sorry about all the noise on Sunday. I know those fireworks couldn't have been fun for you, but it's been two days, so could you please come out of the litter box now?

Sincerely, Kim

Saturday, July 03, 2004

Oh, wow...

I have the worst breath ever right now. I can't do anything about it at the moment. We're short-staffed today, and I can't really leave my desk until Steven comes back from his lunch. The problem is, I didn't realize how horrible my situation was until he had just left. Of course, when I realize something like this, I have to try and figure it out. Lemme see...coffee, Chinese food, mouth-breathing while zoning out to Tetris. Yup. 30 minutes left of atrocious breath. Great.

Observation of the day

The person in the cubicle next to mine just poured himself cereal. Have you ever paid attention when someone was preparing a bowl of cereal? So you pour the milk on top, right? Then you have to pat the flakes down with your spoon - maybe stir them around a bit. I always thought the flakes sounded like tinfoil.

I'll take 2...

Matt, if you're reading this, I apologize...But it's so pretty. (Go to gallery 4, then click on the picture 5 rows down, on the far right.)

Friday, July 02, 2004

So, like, y'know?

Overheard conversation involving two girls walking down the street:

G1: Man! My skin is totally falling off from the sunburn I got last weekend!
G2: Really? You should do what I do. I never peel after a burn.
G1: Wow...What's that?
G2: Well, I always use aloe vera.
G1: Hmm.
G2: Okay, so, during the first few days, when the burn is really bad? You want to cover yourself in aloe in the morning and at night. Or twice a day or whatever, kay?
G1: Uh-Huh.
G2: Then, after the burn has gone down a bit, you only do the aloe thing in the morning, or just less than twice a day.
G1: Yeah.
G2: So, that's what I do, y'know?

Overheard conversation involving a man on the bus and no one else:

Man: Y'know what that Krispy Kreme ought to do?
Everyone else:....
Man: They should get a sign; one of those signs like McDonald's got, that says how many hamburgers they've sold.
Everyone else:....
Man: They sell over a billion donuts a year, y'know?
Everyone else:....
Man: That's a lot of donuts.
Everyone else:....
Man: They're not even that good!
Everyone else:....

Thursday, July 01, 2004

I love public transportation!

I think that I'm more aware of the people on the bus now that I'm posting my thoughts online...They provide such great material! Yesterday someone moved from their spot 2 seats down from me, to sit right next to me. For no particular reason - he didn't even try to start a conversation. He was a really sweaty bike-rider, and it grossed me out. This in turn prompted me to hold onto the metal pole, so as not to accidentally bump into "sweaty biker guy" if the bus lurched to a stop. A few moments later, someone else boarded the bus. We'll call him "sweat-pants man". When "sweat-pants man" got on the bus, there were tons of empty seats. He opted to stand right in front of me, and lean against the pole, in such a way that his ass was right above my hand. I was wedged between "sweaty biker guy" and "sweat-pants man". Ugh.

Now, I'm not overly sensitive about personal space. You really can't be on public transportation. But c'mon people!

Wednesday, June 30, 2004

"I want to fall apart slower than anyone!"

On the bus ride home yesterday, I overheard an older woman conversing with someone. "I want to live to 130. Maybe longer!" Until this point, I had never realized the importance of one's lower teeth. As this woman spoke, her tongue kept rolling right out of her mouth. I had to wonder if this was a result of her missing lower teeth, or just lack of interest in controlling her tongue.

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Oh, there you are!

Not sure how huge my fan base has become, since no one has left comments, but for those of you that missed me, sorry I couldn't post this weekend. For the time being, I have to post at work, since I don't have internet access at home. Normally I would be at work on Saturday, but I needed a mental health day, otherwise known as: I had a "migraine".

So, it's out...I work on Saturdays. The great thing about Saturdays is that while I'm getting ready for work in the morning, Matt and I have really interesting conversations. Fortunately I'm aware enough of my surroundings at that hour to appreciate them. I think Matt is too tired to realize what he's saying sometimes. For example:

Him: What do you want to do tonight?
Me: I don't know, what do you want to do?
Him: We should do something nice.
Me: What do you mean, "something nice"?
Him: You know, just something nice.
Me: (trying to get more clarification) Well, we always do nice things.
Him: Okay, then lets do something bad!

Friday, June 25, 2004

Um...huh?

Damn you, Tetris! Damn you to hell!

TGIF: This is not my life.

I once read or heard someone say that we're only making ourselves age faster when we constantly look forward to the weekend. So what does that say for those of us who simply look forward to going home and drinking a beer at the end of each day? My guess is that we're making ourselves age, and get fat faster.

So, girly night wasn't so bad. I'm now the proud owner of a little pink purse. My new purse is so cute! It even has a little matching coin purse! I still stand by my previous statement, however. I am not girly! It was the wine, I swear. The wine made me do it.

All of the ladies at girls night were so excited about my new purchase. "Oh, it's the perfect size for some cash and your lipstick!". Um, try chapstick, honey. My purse comes with two strap options. There's the short, "carry your purse in your hand" type strap, and then there's the "over the shoulder" variety. In my opinion, the best part about my new purse is that the smaller strap is the perfect length to be a little pink collar! Y'know what's frightening? I can totally picture the pink collar, with the purse, and some matching pink strappy heels. Not girly at all...right.


Thursday, June 24, 2004

Accomplished by lunch!

1. I arrived at the office on time, regardless of the fact that all of my clocks were blinking when I woke up. I'm not sure what caused the outage - it's just a normal overcast day in Seattle.

As stated in m-w.com, pretentious can be defined as "exaggerated importance". Am I the only one who finds "the office" pretentious sounding? I mean, who says that, anyway???

2. I have read all of my online news sources, including The Seattle Times, CNN, Netscape, Eonline and The Stranger.

US flight training exercises are scheduled for today. The drills will involve fighter planes and other aircraft flying at low altitudes throughout the day. I guess they wanted to let us know so that we wouldn't start ducking under bushes, which, as one of my friends recently stated, "totally works".

3. I have managed to avoid playing tetris or solitaire.

Work is pretty slow these days, so sometimes I find that I've been playing computer games for several hours. This is pretty amazing in itself, considering the consistency of my brain matter at that point.

4. I managed to get myself looped into "girly night"; I'm leaving work early for it, no less. I guess I could be called girly at times, though I've always been irritated by girly things. What does this mean????

"Girly night" is being held at Jardin, a local winery by my house. Once a month they have a girls night. Tonight they will have hair models on site to show the new summer styles! Oooh, and we'll get demonstrations of waxing techniques. Gross. Well, I suppose the on site wine will make the on site models and waxing more interesting.

5. I set up my new blog. Ta-da!